Home > Musings on diversity > It’s got to be an Audi

It’s got to be an Audi

I recognise that it might be a stretch to shoehorn this into any kind of musings on diversity – random or otherwise – but as an equal opportunity automobile fantasist (since I can’t afford any of them) I have got to say that there is no more exciting car on the road today than the Audi.

I was driving downtown the other day when one of the new Audis came up on my left. It’s hard to explain, but where other cars have to make some visible effort to accelerate, the Audi just goes faster. I was struggling to explain to myself why I had that impression and the nearest I can come is to say that where other cars roll, the Audi levitates. It’s always tempting to anthropomorphize, but instead of some human analogue, what springs to mind is a Cylon – and not the jerkily moving toaster model that it resembles (the front bank of lights look like the sweeping light that Cylons use to scan the environment), but the fluid, effortless glide of a Number 6. Maybe it’s that combination of machine parts and human expression.

The visible part of the car looks serene and ‘motionless’, while underneath there must be some frenzy of activity equivalent to Fred Flintstone starting his car – that you just don’t see. Maybe it’s that Autobahn heritage, but the Audi’s only desire seems to be to get ahead and to go as fast as space will allow – and it never breaks a sweat doing it. It accelerates, it sweeps into openings in traffic. It never seems aggressive or agitated. It just moves calmly, but relentlessly forward.

Japanese cars perform, but have no personality. The other German cars are merely pretenders. Whatever the designers at Audi have going on, no one can touch them right now.And if Audi sees fit to send me a car to thank me for the plug, ethical imperatives would compel me to tearfully decline – unless they’re really persuasive.

Categories: Musings on diversity
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